Why I don´t ask anyone to chant for me?

Ahh don´t worry, i am sure many of you won´t even read it thanks to the Blunt title ;)

Well truth is bitter and at least i can say it for myself without telling you to do what you should or shouldn´t.

Soon going to hit 6 years to my journey of practicing this Buddhist philosophy. Some days i am rocking and other days i can barely crawl. Most of my these 6 years, my fight has gone only tougher and so i got only stronger. I have come a long way from sensitive and emotionally vulnerable girl to groomed, strong and independent lady. I found self love including love for my flaws from looks, body or my career perspective with some grown up vision and love for my single life and beauty of dressing up for myself and so on. 

Major karma i face includes relationships from family, friends and work with spice of financial, career and home and so on. Anything left no :P Any regrets, NO :) Any doubts for practice, NO :)

Why i chose not to ask anyone to do Daimoku for me?

• I am a Buddha, I am my Gohonzon and believing in law means believing that i am a buddha.

• I took buddhist practice because it gives me power to be my own creator. It means i have power to change my life for good with my faith in daimoku. 

• I look inside me and bring my power out to face my challenges rather than looking out like a beggar and asking others to help.

• If someone themselves support me by their daimoku then i am grateful and i do appreciation daimoku. 

Reason: I never encountered any leader or sensei asking anyone to chant for them in fact only guidance or words I ever got is, ¨please chant for yourself, your buddhahood and so on¨ because it is always my Daimoku for my life. If I don´t have faith in my Daimoku and my buddhahood and me being a Bodhisattva then surely no one can save me. My strong ichinen may protect my family but it is my own action and my own Daimoku that permeates to the life of the people around me likely said, ¨One who prays will see receive benefits and protection for the seven generation of his family¨. Even the thought of asking someone to chant for me makes me cringe out of fear that my faith is not enough or i am once again looking out for a god to save me. 

Every obstacle made me go back to basics, strengthen my three pillars of faith, practice and study and there has been no looking back rather i chant for others but majorly for them to realize their limitless potential on base of faith and understand the limitless power of their own Gohonzon. To conclude, let´s not forget NIchiren Daishonin Buddhism was started with the main principle of not dependent on any priest to chant for us rather to be able to lead our own lives.

Crux: If you can´t eat food or take shower or pay my rent or workout on my behalf or i can´t ask you to do gongyo for me right? Then why would you chant and grow spiritually or my behalf because it won´t work like when i eat and do things for myself. Similarly our practice is no different.

Happy Chanting

What should i do? How should i pray? How can i do more activities?

These question are very common after all we are so busy these days with family, work and then house work and additional health care and so on. Obviously, where do we have time to chant or home visit or go to meetings when we can barely finish with our daily activities. After all, we are so sleepy that 6 hour sleep is never enough or talking with friends or sitting with family or going for movies on Sunday is more tempting than going to a meeting. 

So, how do we or when should we work on our three pillars of practice?

Self talk: I sat down and thought about my whole day schedule and realized that the reason i am asking these questions is that i know i am not giving my best. I know i can do my best but it will need me to work harder and organise better. So, what did i decide?

I personally stay 12-15 hours outside my house including work and gym. Then how and why should i practice? 

Firstly, it was important for me to understand the reason why i practice just for benefits or to really change my negative karma into positive? Well for me, my Buddhism practice is like center of my life, if i don´t make by daimoku as base of everything then i lack wisdom to organize better or do my best. Eventually, i take small happenings of day including remarks of people like from my boss, colleagues or friends too personally. It lowers my life state, mood and eventually i end up losing my focus and i mess up everything. Without a high life state, i end up falling in face of challenges and feel hopeless. I don´t even feel the fire to continue with life or grow further in my life. 

Conclusion: Buddhism practice is food for my soul and it is my only way to stay strong spiritually, it only help me walk courageously through my daily challenges but also gives me protection and opportunities to improve myself. Eventually, these good points are not only in my own life but they also permeates to the life of people around me including my family, friends and colleagues and so on. 

Ques: How do i do everything despite of mess of my own life?

Answer: Well, i have understood the importance of practice so there is no doubt i have to do it despite of my laziness or chilling out when i should chanting. You must have heard, ¨if  it is important enough then you will make time and do it.¨ So it goes for our practice, if you truly want to make Gohonzon as center of your life then you will make it one by first waking up and chanting and putting your best food forward for the day. If you have ichinen then you will, chant to be able work efficiently so that you can do a home visit in evening. If you have heart filled with Nichiren Daishonin spirit then you will make it to the meetings on weekends and if Sensei´s word touched you, then you will not give up in face of challenges. 

Take home message:

Don´t ask others but ask yourself, if you are not giving your best and not putting Gohonzon or this practice as center of your life then you know it deep down. If you want to see those changes that others report in their victories then you have to put action and chant to be able to over come your weakness and live life with that limitless potential through faith. 

If you are already doing enough with activities, daimoku or study then it will be reflected in your life state, and daily life that is free from doubts or questions. 

If you feel like you see no movement or feel like, you take one step ahead but find yourself 5 steps behind… oops, What to do?

You do daimoku, take new determination or challenge for going to the meeting and suddenly something happens and you are like ¨Dammit I take one step forward and Bammm, 5 steps back¨.

Incidence: Just 2 weeks ago, I was going for home visits and meetings despite of 30 or 70km distance but for some reason I knew that despite huge issues I already had, it was silence before the storm. As soon as I got back, I was set on fire with work deadlines and went to a conference with my boss and a fellow colleague where I had a good response to my work but this spirit was destroyed soon with constant negative remarks from my boss. As If didn’t have enough on my plate, someone pick pocketed my wallet in a new country with all my cash, cards, visa etc. Running back and forth to police, embassy and story goes on, I reached a point of being left with nothing but only faith. While i am aiming for my biggest goal of practice for coming November 18 which was put into action almost a year ago.

Result: I finally had time to cry for a change in last 3 months as I didn’t realise how so many things have happened one after another, from my dad´s health to my lost visa. At first, I felt exhausted and hopeless but after 2 days with lots of daimoku I got up again. I reached out to two people who are my friends and mother´s in faith and my only question to them was, tell me which gosho I need to read? Meanwhile I already got myself in action.

Action: I sat for chanting for hours till I felt little better and then I remembered this mother of faith told me once, ¨Sit for daimoku and put your brain aside and chant to have a new mind filled with wisdom with each nam myoho renge kyo¨. I did it while I put my heart into Gohonzon as a centre of my life. I read gosho continuously till I encountered what I needed. ¨ The Lotus Sutra states that if there are men and women who have firm faith in this sutra the Buddha will support them on his shoulders and carry them on his back. ¨ (Gosho, vol 1: The Supremacy of law)

I did feel like the more I pour in Daimoku, more I was sliding back but that was my mind talking. I looked in my heart and reflected upon everything. Interestingly, it is second time in my whole life that my wallet was stolen. It was just in time as I was moving ahead for the finale of my biggest goal. Obviously, there is no coincidence it all happened as I have a bigger mission and more the darkness, brighter the moon will be. My victories will shine like that full moon on a dark night. I knew all I need now is faith, interestingly being a logical person I was chanting to have more faith in my Gohonzon. And so with Daimoku I knew this is my opportunity to strengthen my faith rather than begrudging about what has happened or feeling like ¨Poor me¨. Every happening is a clear answer to our prayer like a blessing in disguise. Daishonin says,

¨Strengthen your resolve more than ever. Ice is made of water, but it is colder than water. Blue dye comes from indigo, but when something is repeatedly dyed in it, the color is better than that of the indigo plant. The Lotus Sutra remains the same, but if you repeatedly strengthen your resolve, your color will be better than that of others, and you will receive more blessings than they do.¨ (Gosho, vol 1: The Supremacy of law)

Personal learning:

·         This is the time to keep faith and only move forward without any doubt

·         I am trying to re-polish my gongyo while improving quality of Daimoku

·         Started byakuren once again with new attitude, I went yesterday not to have time to chant for me but I went there to be at service for other members. Also chanted in morning not for me but for members to achieve their limitless potential and joy as they come to kaikan.

·         I have left my problems on side without thinking too much as I focus on my determination to send my victory report to sensei for coming November 18.

Take home message:

If you ask me next time, what I should do now, my life is hopeless. And I will answer consistent practice, polish your 3 pillars of practice above all chant for others and take gakkai duties not for selfish purpose of victory but to really be there as a bodhisattva when you can´t even stand for yourself.