To the Man who is willing to Love me

I want to tell you this as no one else will tell you a bit...

It is like a bright sunny day and i am the chirpy bird you meet. You see the sparkle in my eyes and you see how fresh is my laugh and my exhilarating energy seeps through me to you. You feel nothing but a spur of love for me as i make you fall in love with life once again. You have found that life is worth living again as my smile brings you to smile. You fall in love with me and you go all the way to make me feel how you feel for me. We will reach the skies and we will be high, we will be everything we wanna be till the dark night will arrive.

But you need to know this, Women is not just strong but fragile too and so do i.

I am both and i know it and i am honest about it. There will be days when i will be on the peak and i will live like a fierce lioness and with a lion king's heart. I will give my 100% and the world will give me back.  One of these days you fell in love with me not knowing that my energy reaches up high because yesterday i was drowning in my tears. Today my mental illness is at it´s bay and i know i must live now as storm will be back and i will be a wreck again. I live with depression and it never leaves it home i.e in my bones. There are nights when i binge on sad songs and movies to cry out the every bit of sadness i feel inside me. I know my pain bring you sadness and i am deeply sorry. But when you still stick by and make me high despite all my fright, how much i am thankful to you for your limitless love and try. You don´t know how scared i am, as every time i cry, i feel like may be this is it. You won´t stick by and i will have nothing but a further cry. How do i tell that this is my fright that despite my shine you will shun away through my cry. It is not you, it is me and the fight going inside me.

I reach out to you as i trust you with my darkness like i do with my brightness. I let you in not to suck you in my darkness but to pull me out of it. Or just sit by my side till storm will be gone. You told me i was worth every bit of it then today why you shun away at a glimpse of it.

Love is not what we make in bed, love is at times being with me curled up on that bathroom floor while my body in fetal position just won´t let go. I know i deserve that love and i know i am worth it but do you, if you do then learn this dark secret of mine and stay if you feel that i am worth that every whine...